


goodbye summer (2019 ver)

by nonamebut



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Getting Back Together, M/M, Mark Lee (NCT)-centric, Non-Linear Narrative, Post-Break Up, idolverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-03
Updated: 2019-05-03
Packaged: 2020-02-16 12:48:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18691816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nonamebut/pseuds/nonamebut
Summary: 1. Mark Lee's embarrassing pre debut song written about Lee Donghyuck (NEW)2. Twice's comeback (-1)3. That OST from the new Song Jongki drama (+4)4. Spring Day (+612)





	goodbye summer (2019 ver)

**Author's Note:**

> [this song might seem like just another typical love song (no words can describe this beautiful feeling)](https://open.spotify.com/track/5IBPEUQeygfPP9UKaiqWmJ?si=wNZzk_lSRDiigBecilMnEA)
> 
> if you can guess who the boyle is let me know i would like to find out if i'm too obvious or too discreet hehe. you can also check the end note if you haven't seen brooklyn 99 / don't get the weird vague reference i made to it! lastly, the actual title of mark's track is up to your imagination :D

Mark Lee is just nineteen years old when his first self written and self composed SM Station gets an all kill within days of its release.

He’s just ended a call with his parents when he finds out.  Someone, probably Johnny, started yelling for everyone to check the charts, so now the whole dorm is screaming _Mark you’re amazing I knew you were going to do it we believed in you Mark congratulations!_

Gently tossing his phone on the bed, Mark heads out to greet his hyungs.

He passes by Jaehyun, midknock and midway to another failed attempt to coax Donghyuck out of their shared room.  Jungwoo ends up pulling the both of them to the living room couch without Donghyuck.

The Mark from yesterday feared that he would feel overwhelmed, but his mind is surprisingly calm.  It’s quiet, still.

When Doyoung asks him how he’s holding up, though, all he says is: kinda tired, but, like, the good kind of tired.  You know?

(Taeil ends up losing a bet they all secretly made, something heavily reliant on how many _like_ s Mark drops in conversation after his station, naturally, hit big.  Everyone present laughs.)

 

—

 

Naver’s Rising Searches 1~10

1 Mark Lee Song  
2 Mark Lee  
3 English to korean dictionary  
4 demouth meaning  
5 Online dictionary  
6 NCT Mark girlfriend  
7 Mark Lee Song lyrics  
8 One punchman season 2 episode 4  
9 cha eunwoo  
10 sports team vs sports team

 

—

 

“Good work,” Donghyuck says, deceptively sweet.  It’s the first and only time Mark sees Donghyuck from the moment SM announces the details of his track up until its actual release.

But Mark, who feels the days simply slipping past his fingers, doesn’t it realize it yet.  The dates all blur into each other at the passing of each season; there are so many, other things on his mind.

Work work work.  Mark is the one who has filled up notebook after notebook just to describe some elusive, fleeting feeling that SM likes to label as love, but somehow Donghyuck still manages to render him speechless with a single word.

Mark reaches out, grabs Donghyuck’s wrist.  “Hey, hey —”

He’s never told the younger boy about a lot of the songs penned in his journals.  This one in particular was a song he hoped he’d never have to explain away. The thought of having to do that now makes Mark sweat.

When Mark says, “SM got my journal, somehow,” it sounds way too practiced for his liking.  In fact, he hadn’t planned what he’s about to say at all. He tossed and turned in bed and couldn’t decide what to say; it was like the dull hum of the air condition was mocking him the whole night.  “I think the managers saw it lying around and thought there was potential —”

“ — So the song.”  Donghyuck crosses his arms, scuffs the toe of his converse on the familiar practice room floor.  His voice carries, it sounds like a _I haven’t heard it, but knowing you, it’s probably great._

And yet, Mark likes to think he still knows this boy too well, for too long, having watched him when he thought no one was looking.  He’s spent winters trying to understand the difference between a shiver and an enigmatic tightening of the shoulders — he’s come to observe correlations between outfits and moods after many spring days.  In the fall, there are movies and melodramas that must never be mentioned.

 _So this song you made was never going to be released in the first place?_ Donghyuck’s lips read, _you’re not gonna end up taking responsibility for it?_

Mark reminisces the heat from before, the scalding burns not just from the harsh weather that summer of 2017.  Recalls waking up only to work work work, then sleeping, then waking again to another day to a sun that only continued to beat down on him so unforgivingly.

“Yes… I guess?” Mark ends up answering with a question.

Donghyuck’s back seems broader than Mark remembers.  “I don’t mean to pry, sorry. Congratulations again.”

 

—

 

**the nine nine**

 

**9:09 PM**

 

(g)mina  
MARK congrats omg youre still trending???? 

scullyhoon  
congratulations mark!

hitchcock (other woojin)  
The song is amazing!  You were worried for nothing, everyone loves an honest sweet love song

peralta (nojam ver)  
Hahahahah thank you guys!  
Also Mina check your PM

cuter girl boyle  
Not to take the 99 concept so seriously but just tell us about Amy here PLEASE don’t do anything stupid

peralta (nojam ver)  
First of all you were the one that suggested we use that theme for our nicknames in the first place  
Secondly I didn’t even say anything related to Haechan though you’re the one who brought him up haha  
Lastly Mina seriously check your PM

✓ Seen by everyone

 

—

 

It’s the third of May, in a hotel located in Phoenix, when Donghyuck says for the first and last time, “If I told you I wanted to tell people about us…”

It’s also the first time Mark’s brain shuts up the way it does, quieting to nothingness, though not the last time he wonders just what brought the strange moment of serenity about.

It’s the third of May, in a hotel located in Phoenix.  After today, everything gets all jumbled up. More so than before, if everyone’s being honest.  After today, all Mark will really remember is this:

“ — as in, the public people.  To tell them.”

Their knees press together.  The clock on the wall opposite them ticks obnoxiously.  Donghyuck, ever so faithful, prompts, “What would you say?”

Mark swallows.

He’d say: something.  There were many somethings that were ringing in his head not too long ago, weren’t there?

Perhaps the very uproar that often took residence in his consciousness, the same cacophony he typically despises, would be better than whatever’s happening to him now.  Too much over nothing at all.

Though this is _something_ , it’s not an appropriate something.  It’s not tangible, nor graspable, and most importantly, it’s something Mark never says aloud.

Donghyuck’s shoulders tighten in a way unfamiliar to Mark.  “You cling to me and hug me and hold me close, and that’s caught all on camera!”

There’s a pause, but it becomes something palpable when it’s from Donghyuck.  “You already know I’m okay with coming out with it, with us — as long as we’ve got each others backs.  You know? Like old times.”

Like always, Mark wants to say.  His imagination can’t even muster a throwback to a familiar song, to lyrics Donghyuck must desperately want him to remember.  His mouth goes dry.

“Say something,” Donghyuck says.   _Even if that something is a no_ , goes unsaid.

It’s the third of May, in a hotel located in Phoenix, when for the first and the last time — Mark doesn’t say anything.

 

—

 

7 Voice Messages for Lee Donghyuck

my moon (taeil) 💫 (1 Message)  
_[indistinct chatter in the background] ... “Hey, I’m getting you that ice cream you really like.  Let’s eat all the sweets we can while manager hyung isn’t home, okay?” ... [vague beeping noises, the faint crinkling of plastic] ...  “Okay!” … [a pause, distracted, the sound of a bell chiming] ... “Okay, I’m on the way home now, so better prepare that movie, Donghyuck-ah!” … [line clicks off]_

SM Entertainment Mark Lee (4 Messages)  
> Delete all?   **YES** | no

best roommate and most handsome hyung ever, sorry johnny hyung (2 Messages)  
_“Haechan, can you please unlock the door?  I need to get my stuff.” [line clicks off]  
__“No, really!  I’m not doing this for Mark this time.  I’m sneaking out to hang out with some friends, Jungkook’s only back for a while too, so please please please help me out?” [line clicks off]_

 

—

 

Mark Lee is barely thirteen years old when he makes his first ever song, lyrics and melody and all.

His mind clamors, all these different ideas fighting to be heard, to be heard, to be heard.

Mark gives up and just speaks them all onto the paper.  He takes his guitar and strings the noisiest concepts together, making up meanings just to fill up the more silent words.

In the midst of it all, there's probably a point to be made. There’s probably a point he _is_ making, whether he gets it or not.  At thirteen Mark still isn't sure what it is.

(Maybe it’s the mundanity of training and training and training and running towards — something.  It’s hard to tell what’s what, sometimes, when he even dreams of himself in this very practice room, going through a routine he’s gonna end up polishing even when he’s awake.)

When it gets too late, Donghyuck's voice cuts through the studio, calling him back home.

Mark could recognize that voice anywhere, the very timbre of the person that helps him get through the repeating days.  It inspires Mark to cross out nearly everything he’s already written and single out the one idea he knows he can definitely write about: of, well —

 

—

 

 **Exclusive Interview with NCT’s Mark Lee: The Meaning Behind His Latest Hit Single  
**By Pisdatch

 

_Hi, Mark!  Let’s get right to it, give us a quick introduction to the love song that’s been heating up Korea’s sound waves._

In short, I’d say the song is about finally finding the words to explain how you feel… even if you have to make those words up.

 

_Right!  Aside from all the fun word play in both Korean and English, you coined a bunch of new words of your very own language.  I saw even one of the words — demouthed, was it? — trended! What does it even mean?_

Yes, I was so surprised to see it trend!  My labelmate, Yeri, who is actually slated to release another self composed station in a few weeks, kept updating me with screenshots of the trending page.

For the meaning… Demouthed in the first verse means the person I’m speaking to like the devil to me, but later on in my last rap it means being rendered speechless.  So, using it is like a really extreme way to describe the intense, um, attraction you may feel towards someone, depending on the context and structure of the sentence.

 

_That’s so interesting!  You really captured the evolution of meaning that way.  On a similar note, I heard that this song is really old?  Did you have to change it much to reflect how you currently feel?_

Yes, it was actually my first song.  I made it when I was still a trainee, when I was still new to Korea.  I actually didn’t change any of the lyrics at all, and only added some modern sounds and stuff, but all in all I wanted to capture the nostalgic feeling of an old song.  What I felt then is actually the same as how I feel now.

 

_On the topic of feelings, do you have a certain someone you wrote this song for?_

I don’t think my company will allow me to drop any names just yet, but yes, I wrote this with someone in mind. _[ soft chuckle ]_

 

_What do you hope people in general will feel, then, after listening to this song?_

I think it’s also easy to forget that maybe we don’t speak the same language, you know?  Like, not just literal language, but also love languages and stuff like that. And sometimes we have, like, an image or assumption about people or things.  And even though we may think highly of someone, no one’s superhuman?

 

_So…_

_[ bright laugh ]_ So I mean that I hope that this song can inspire people to make a compromise.  We’re all coming from different countries and backgrounds, we’re all unique in our own ways.  Despite that, maybe we can all come together and find a way to tell each other how we really feel.

 

_Just like the theme of NCT’s old album, correct?_

Ah, yes, empathy!  Exactly, that’s a theme I really wanted to convey….. **[read more]**

 

—

 

“I hate it when you avoid me,” says Mark, his tone misleading and light.  He hopes it’s the first and only time he does this, this _something_ that he’s maybe, finally, figured out.

“You have something you want to say to me, hyung?”

Donghyuck’s back is still as broad as he remembers.  Mark sits a few inches away from him, the bed dipping slightly under the new weight.

“Yeah, I do.  Please listen and let me finish before you say anything, okay?  There’s something I need to explain.”

The Mark from yesterday may have feared being overcome by the noise, by all the feelings fighting for some kind of recognition.  At thirteen years old, Mark would have ignored it all and let all the conflicting ideals clash with one another, just wanting to get through another day with his chin held as high as he could muster.

But it’s 2019 — yes, this is what Mark starts with.  It’s 2019 and he’s done some more growing up.

“I’ve always thought you grew up too quickly.  Quicker than us dreamies, sometimes.” Donghyuck says this quietly, gently, but Mark still picks it up.  This is something Mark can understand.

Mark takes this as a kind of encouragement.  Reaches out, slides his palm across the sheets til it bumps against Donghyuck’s hand.  Mark is reminded of late summer nights, when they still didn’t know more than half the things they know now, when they tangled their pinkies together just like this.  An unspoken promise that stretched years into the future.

“Sorry,” Donghyuck says to his pillow.  It’s strange seeing the roles so reversed.  “I interrupted.”

It’s all fine.

At least, it’s what Mark wants them to be now.  Fine. That’s what he’s wanted to say, all this time.  So that’s what he does: he says, _sometimes I forget that the things that you say aren’t always what you really mean._  It’s so easy to forget Donghyuck often speaks with his hands, and most especially, not in the way Mark does.

“I’m sorry, too.”  Donghyuck’s eyes shine.  He would say that it’s just the lighting making him look like everything Mark wants to keep in his life, but Mark doesn’t say anything to prompt it.

(Mark misses him too much, and he doesn’t want to scare him off now that they’re wanting to be on the same page.)

There’s a pause, but it doesn’t feel pressuring, the way they _kind of_ normally do coming from Donghyuck.

“I keep forgetting that you aren’t as touchy as me.”   _I forget that touch can be lost in translation._

Mark lies down, presses his shoulder to Donghyuck’s. This is the something Mark has been writing about all his life: the words he’s been holding close for warmth in the winter, the phrases he’s been stitching together every spring. In the fall, these become the memories he’ll look back on, when the nostalgia and sentimentality hit hardest.

Lying next to him is his own personal summer. The something (the someone) that inspires him to make each day count.

Donghyuck’s smile is sweeter than Mark remembers. “For real this time — congratulations on hitting it big, hyung.”

Mark mirrors a smile back. He really did hit the jackpot.

 

—

 

**[ENTER-TALK] NCT Mark and NCT Haechan are dating?!**

Barely a week after NCT Mark’s solo release, SM Entertainment confirms the relationship between NCT Mark and Haechan!  Oh my god!!!!!

“NCT Mark and Haechan have always been very fond of each other.  We hope that, despite the growth of their relationship as they have matured, people will continue to look favorably on the two bandmates.  Thank you for your understanding.”

[+ 12,712,712] [- 7,127,127]

 

  1. [+12 700, -4 090] heol……. Isn’t this like some real life drama?  The childhood friends who were always sweet for each other got together…… this is so sweet!



 

  1. [+8 240, -7 716] i mean if i can’t have oppa he can be with my other oppa kkkkkkk



 

  1. [+8 020, -606] amazing how the foreigner fans are so invested in this?  Have you guys seen that “markhyuck summer fight 2017” video that’s been trending worldwide?



 

> └ that’s such an old video too… they’ve been supporting it since forever, apparently…

 

  1. [+6 060, -802] so the song he made is about his team mate???  Wow and to think that everyone kept trashing on all those poor girl group members TT TT



 

  1. [+6 006, -802] all of a sudden his lyrics make sense



 

  1. [+5 606, -82] woah they tried to go live just a while ago and crashed the app server… they are also still trending on twitter…… before today I didn’t even know who these kids were



 

> └ right??  this is such a PR move
> 
>  
>
>> └ don’t feed the troll guys let’s move on

 

  1. [+4 127, -66] as a member of the lgbt community i feel so proud of these two.  It’s also nice to see myself represented in the gayo community. I hope they continue to work hard and honestly



 

  1. [+4 012, -7] their song is actually really good?  It’s so catchy, it’s still on the roof top for a reason.  And the message is so good too, i’m glad kids these days have such responsible role models to look up to



**Author's Note:**

> [and i still don't know how i feel about it but i feel like i'm learning (how to clear my head when all i think about is you)](https://open.spotify.com/track/3qXvTE8lZCCO5192IBxRwB?si=7C351gM1RCW9f8gXItH3AA)
> 
> if you've never seen b99, one of the ships in it is comprised of jake (mark's gc nickname) and amy (how the 99ers jokingly call hyuck) and the number one hypeman for their relationship is boyle (aka the mystery 99liner)
> 
> anyway thank you for reading! <3 i wrote this fairly quickly (idk where it came from honestly????) and didn't really plan it to the usual extent but hopefully it's still an understandable work! i'd appreciate it a lot if you let me know what you think c: and yeah i think that's it good night my dudes hope you all have a great weekend ahead :)


End file.
